The zen of fulfillment, spending quiet time alone, is where you find satisfaction in your life.
Sitting quietly with yourself is a skill. Once developed you won’t need to look outside of yourself to find a distraction. Being my best friend was hard to do. I’m glad I learned to love me for all my faults and imperfections.
Can you sit still and wait patiently for a dentist appointment, your grade on an assignment or a job application? It’s hard to quietly sit and wait when you fear to be alone. Some of my favorite times are when I’m alone, but it wasn’t always like this. I had to learn to love myself. You don’t get to spend free time without a task, colleague, child, husband, chore or schedule nagging you.
Being able to spend time alone quietly with yourself leads to satisfaction and fulfillment.
Fulfillment is spending quality time alone with your new best friend, yourself.
The ability to sit quietly with a friend is beautiful. I’m sure you have heard that true friendship is being able to sit in silence for hours. The silence is not uncomfortable. The two of you just sit back and be. Love and understanding can be expressed in the moment without words or other distractions. When you take the chance to spend time with your best friend you don’t fill the time with distractions.
Why do you fill your free time, alone time with distractions then? Instead of being lost in someone else’s life on social media, you could just find fulfillment. Learning the skill of becoming your own best friend is one path to finding true satisfaction.
I get it. It’s tough to learn something new. Worse, yet, it sucks unlearning an old habit. The take away here is being fulfilled. Once you become your best friend you will be able to love unconditionally, you will never be alone, and you will find peace of mind. When you understand how much you matter to yourself, it will echo in everything you do and say.
Why is it so hard for you to sit quietly with yourself?
There are many possible factors that make it hard to sit alone:
- Stress, frustrations, worry, and anxiety could be culprits.
- Maybe it’s a buried reaction to a childhood of parents constantly yelling at you for restless movement or excitement and chatter. ”I told you to sit quietly and I won’t tell you again!”
- Worse yet, maybe your parents punished you by making you sit alone in your room for hours on end without friends, family, or any form of entertainment.
- Regret, grief and low self-esteem can also make it hard to sit alone with your thoughts.
Successful people do not need to fill up their time with distractions or companions. They enjoy their time spent alone in quiet reflection.
One of the skills successful people practice is not needing a distraction to enjoy themselves. They find pleasure in the moment.Alone or with someone they love. The key to their satisfaction is that they don’t need to look outside themselves for stimulation. They find this fulfillment within by cataloging, examining, or solving challenges of the past or present.
Once you are able to sit quietly with yourself you can find happiness and fulfillment in your life.
Learning this was especially tough for me because I had much regret from my past.
*the writer sighs and looks down*
Being alone with myself was the perfect way to work through the regret and grief I felt from failure and a life deliberately spent in squalor.
Wrapping it up
Learning to sit in quiet reflection is a skill. You can practice it anywhere. You don’t have to in the desert for 40 days and nights, like Christ or Jim Morrison. I’m talking about being able to commute to work without getting angry. Waiting in a checkout line without complaining or making fun of people.
*guilty at times~I’m not perfect.*
Waiting at the doctor’s office for 3 hours past your scheduled visit. Waiting. However in these moments is when you need to find happiness. Yes I said it. Find happiness waiting! There are no distractions to bother you. The only thing that can distract you is hearing your name called. How much time do you get in a week when someone doesn’t expect something from you? Exactly. Learn to find value in being alone, waiting.